Lost Hearts & The Lonely Nights That Follow

Acceptance.
It can mean seeing someone for who they are.
Or letting someone in when your not sure you should.
Or coming to terms with what you’ve done or who you’ve been in the past.
In the days following the night i almost slit my wrist, I felt like I was being watched more closely. I wasn't sure how anyone had known about that night. Or why anyone cared there on after. But I knew they didn't really care. I was just their job to care.
I vividly remembered the other night a nurse came to check on me. She was obviously new. She just followed the standard procedure, give me my pills, make sure I take them, ask me how I'm doing. Same old, same old. But when she was about to leave, and I had taken my pills, and told the tireless lie that everything was okay. She laid her hand on my check, in the way that only one person used to do. Madison.
"You have beautiful eyes, Jasper." she said, almost in a whisper.
I stared blankly back at her. Not knowing what to say in reply. I hadn't noticed until then, but she spoke remarkably like Madison. In the same dulcet murmur. I blinked back tears as the rush of the emotions from that unforgettable night came back to me. But I didn't know this woman well enough to trust her with my tears.
She then had drawn her hand back and looked away. "I'm sorry." Then she stood and walked toward to door.
"Come back." I said softly. Spoken. Hadn't it been awhile since that occurred.
She quickly turned around. "Please." I spoke again. I wasn't sure what had taken over me.
She walked back over at sat at the foot of my bed. She looked sympathetic, but I could tell a part of her was scared.
Some tears had started to leak out despite my efforts to hold them back. The tears left long smears down my cheek due to the eyeliner. I stopped any more from leaking, but the smudges still remained.
She leaned forwards again whipping the smear of liner off my cheek. "What can I do for you?"
I swallowed hard. "I need something to believe in."
She withdrew again, looking deep in thought. "Have you ever looked to God?"
I shook my head. Organized religion had been frowned upon in my family.
She slightly smiled. "I think he can help you." I looked down. I had my doubts about religion, too.
"I'll take you to a church someday, Jasper. Someday soon. But I have to go." I nodded.
She stood once again and walked to the door. But like before I stopped her again.
"I don't know your name." I mumbled, voice shaking. I'm surprised she even heard me.
She looked slightly over her shoulder. "Sienna." And then she left.
Sienna.
When the memory subsided, I was still laying in my bed, twisting that ring again. I hadn't seen Sienna in a few days. And I was starting to think that maybe that night was all a dream.
Outside my room, the silence was interrupted by what sounded like someone running, and voices followed. The steps came closer to my door. The person outside opened to door and stepped inside, closing the door behind them. It was dark in my room, but I could tell that they were dirty and they had been running longer then from the elevator to my room. They were nervously panting. They were definitely a girl.
Through the darkness came a dulcet murmur...
"Jasper!"
No. I couldn't be. It was.
Madison.